Groucho Marx

Blog Archive – March 2005

Click here for translations

Dervish

“ The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don't go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don't go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don't go back to sleep. ”
Jalal al-din Rumi

Kurt Gödel

Kurt Gödel

Kurt Gödel and Albert Einstein

Kurt Gödel and Albert Einstein

March 28 2005

More gyrations

"Turning and turning in the widening gyre ..." Yeats keeps coming around again. It's that spiral effect. Another aspect of this proving has been the recurring dreams. Over and over again the same theme. Whatever's going on in the dream (and it's largely unimportant) it's being simultaneously mapped in terms of either mathematical formulae or computer programming language. This has been a bit of challenge for me since my abilities in both of those areas don't go much beyond elementary level. Still, I wasn't about to ignore them. What seemed to be drawing my attention the strongest was the fact that these descriptions all featured repeating nested subroutines.

For anyone for whom this means diddly squat, it's a means of describing an event such that within an overall context you have increasingly more specific things going on, each nested within its parent context. In mathematics this is described using bracketed expressions, and in programming language, by a variety of conventions depending on the language. But in each instance, the convention is always that each subroutine must be enclosed within its parent. If you don't close the expression, the whole thing becomes a nonsense and doesn't do what it's supposed to.

Why I was getting these dreams was something of a mystery, but when I finally stumbled on the gyre/guy connection they all of a sudden changed. What was going on in the dream was still being described, but this time in ordinary everyday language. Not just any language though. The directive was that it had to be in non-dualistic terminology. In other words, describing something as a thing-in-itself without judgement, valued or otherwise, or any kind of attribution that would imply or induce a positive or negative charge attached to it. Along with this came a single word – recursion.

I had no idea what this meant at all, so went off to research it. Recursion is a technique used in programming, particularly in systems designed to simulate human thinking ('artificial intelligence'). It involves the use of a particular type of nested subroutine that is self-referential, ie. it calls itself. CLANG! All of a sudden I could see the vortex again, spiralling down out of the vast field of potentiality to the point at which it actuates, becomes "real", and it seemed in that instant abundantly clear that this is the model for how we create our reality.

Following up on this some more, and taking in en route summaries of work such as Douglas Hofstadter's Gödel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Braid just underlined it. Gödel's Theorem is an interesting one – published in 1931 by the then 25-year-old logician, it demonstrated that "any logical system comprehensive enough to describe elementary arithmetic necessarily contains propositions which can neither be proven nor disproven." Also, that "the internal consistency of such a system can never be proven except by employing reasoning which is not expressible within the system itself." Or, as reviewer Curtis L Wilber states in respect of Hofstadter's Gödel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Braid, "Every system folds in on itself, be it physics, mathematics, or any form of language. All these systems are inherently self-referential, and as such, take on a life of their own. A life their creators could never imagine." In other words, the "reality" of what we take for reality cannot be proven or disproven within its own terms: we're thrown back on the ultimate subjectivity of our existence every time, and the fact that we're continually engaged in the process of creating our "reality" largely in our own image. The "life of its own" that comes back to us in the apparent objectivity of what's "out there" is really little more than a mirror – an idea which the likes of Buddhism has held as a fundamental truth for millenia.

Escher vortex

At the same time as all this has been going on, I was having a conversation with someone in the USA about the Christian fundamentalist right and their belief in "the Rapture". Scarey stuff. It even justifies environmental destruction on the basis that it will just speed up the End Times when Jesus Christ reappears to cart off the righteous to a better place, leaving the rest to rot in what's Left Behind. It's that "chosen race" theme again, isn't it? All too reminiscent of Hitler's "master race". She sent me a couple of URLs to explore. As I was looking around wondering at the leaps in logic that allowed some quite outrageous conclusions to be drawn from what appeared to be exceedingly flimsy "evidence", all I could see was Kurt Gödel perched genie-like atop a spinning vortex with a wry smile on his face. After all, exactly the same criticisms could be levelled at my view of reality, your view of reality, anybody's view of reality.

Isn't it amazing where dreams get you ...

March 28 2005 | | | Permalink

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The Shady Bunch

“ ... I danced on a Friday when the sky turned black.
It's hard to dance with the devil on your back ... ”
from Lord of the Dance

March 25 2005

I danced on a Friday when the sky turned black ...

Is it any coincidence that these topics are coming up for air in the week before Easter?! Absolutely not! There's no such thing as coincidence. It's always sympathetic resonance. Today is Good Friday. And again no accident that I was responding to one of the many emails I've had on this subject and got into the darker aspects of what's going on. After all, the sky turned black on Good Friday.

It all followed on from stumbling across a load of sites questioning the official account of what happened on September 11th 2001 (while following a photo trail for the images for March 23rd's blog entry). There's so much on the subject! The passenger lists of the fated aircraft and CCTV records of boarding passengers that throw doubt on the existence of any "Arab terrorists". The evidence of chemical and civil engineers that attests to the impossibility of such a conflagration resulting from burning aviation fuel alone, or that the destruction of the towers could possibly have happened in the way it did without controlled demolition being involved. The seismic records that register massive shocks the moment before the towers came down. And much more besides.

There's a strange fascination with this stuff. There's the impetus to go deeper in search of the truth. To explore just what depths of depravity it's possible for human beings to sink to. Equally well there's a resistance, because to follow this trail to its inevitable conclusion takes you into a very very dark, unpleasant, uncomfortable place. One that most people naturally baulk at. To take this on board is to take on board that not just your fellow human beings, but fellow human beings who are supposed to be on your "side", who are supposed to be looking after your best interests, damn it, are capable of perpetrating acts for which no despicable superlative seems anywhere near adequate.

Few species in nature turn on their own kind. It's deeply ingrained within us that this behaviour just isn't natural. Oh sure, we've got the odd serial killers amongst us, the odd Adolf Hitler or Pol Pot, but they're the exception, aren't they? They're twisted and warped and pretty inhuman, aren't they?

Or are they?

Maybe they're only too human, and our collective inability to countenance that each and every one of us has the latent potential to behave in the same manner is what allows those who know only too well what they're capable of carte blanche to carry on doing what they're doing safe in the knowledge that nobody will believe it even when it's right under their noses.

Shadow issues really don't get much deeper than this. And yet it remains perfect. Perfect for each of us, collectively and individually, to acknowledge the reflection of our interior landscape. One of the signature features of the nature of cancerous energy is life energy that's lost its intended focus. The enormous amount of our personal power and responsibility that we've handed over to our various leaderships in the naïve trust that they will indeed look after our best interests is beginning to look decidedly misplaced. As indeed it should. Around half of our populations don't even exercise their right to channel the responsibility they hand over to whoever's going to take care of things on the collective level. We get the leaders we deserve unfortunately, and these ones would appear to be the culmination of more than a few decades of handing over responsibility in an unfocused and unthinking manner.

So what to do? Run to the light, cut ourselves off from any relation to these people and cling to the positive side of things? Not a bit of it. It doesn't square with the concept of the oneness of existence and it doesn't square with the drive towards our own personal psychological integration and integrity. In any case, humanity's been doing that since forever and all it gets us is more of the same. As far as I can see, only when we can each stand up and say "The power and ability to callously and brutally murder other human beings resides in me as much as in any killer" can we master this side of our natures. Then we are free to choose not to behave that way, and to act in the most appropriate manner in relation to those who choose otherwise. For as long as we are in denial of the possibility, then that potential remains in shadow, and our belief in the depths of depravity to which human beings are capable of descending remains in suspension, which means that we are incapable of effectively dealing with it when it occurs.

March 25 2005 | | | Permalink

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Bush as saviour. Bush and Christ photo © Timothy Cleary/AFP Bush as Hitler

“ The whole history of science has been the gradual realization that events do not happen in an arbitrary manner, but that they reflect a certain underlying order, which may or may not be divinely inspired. ”
Stephen W Hawking

“ All actions take place in time by the interweaving of the forces of nature, but the man lost in selfish delusion thinks that he himself is the actor. ”
Bhagavad Gita

March 23 2005

The hit man

Again from another forum, the subject of the present US administration came up. Someone wondered why Gore never fought back, and felt a real opportunity had been lost at that point.

This is my take on all of this.

Gore didn't fight because somehow he knew he was on a hiding to nothing. He just had to stand aside and let history take its course. What is going on now is nothing short of archetypal. It's way bigger than any of the individuals involved. Nobody's controlling it because nobody, individually or collectively, has anywhere approaching the kind of power to do so. All of us are just pieces on the chess-board in the game that the collective consciousness is playing out.

Start from the premise that we are all one. Being all one, then everything is part of that oneness. Which means, essentially, that everything is as it should be. If everything is as it should be, then how can we account for the likes of George W? I think it's like this ...

George W Bush is a pretty special individual and it's some role he's taken on for this lifetime. It's probably as well he seems so vacant in the brain department, because if he wasn't then I don't think he could go through with what he's going to be going through with. His role is absolutely pivotal to these times. As is the role played by the rest of his adminstration, every last one of them.

Many comparisons have been made – with good reason – with Hitler's Germany in the 30s. Many are openly stating that they believe Bush to be the Antichrist. Probably about as many as believe he has some Christ-like aura. So take the polarisation out of the equation, and what have we got? What is the coin the two sides of which are Christ and Antichrist? What do Jesus and Hitler have in common? As far as I can see, the Christ energy is all about taking the hit for humanity. Being the lightning conductor for the issues that all of us, en masse, need to integrate; and whether you're doing it consciously with good intent, or being run unconsciously by your shadow, in some ways is not so important.

This is what seems to be the key to Bush's role. He's here to take the hit. He's here to take the hit for the entire corrupt edifice that is corporate immorality in pursuit of pure profit. He's the means by which we rediscover the heart-centred morality and ethics which has all but wholly disappeared from Western society and fast leaving the East as well as they all get hitched to the $-bandwagon. Laws aren't the answer. If you have to force morality on people on penalty of whatever, you're just going to end up with a permanent program of prison-building. Morality has to come from the heart.

So George W is going to be the exemplar. He's standing up there to be tore down for all he stands for. He and his administration collectively exemplify Western society's shadow. And all of them are up there, putting it all right in our faces so we can no longer ignore it. So we can look deep within our hearts and find the George W Bush within, the Dick Cheney within, the Donald Rumsfeld within, the Condoleezza Rice within, the Alberto Gonzales within. So we can look at the nations of which we're part and see that what's going on behind the scenes to provide the way of life we take for granted is not far from being on a par with the Holocaust. So we finally have to do something about it. It's not just the administration that needs to come down – it's the entire corrupt corporate culture that underpins Western society. This is why Gore didn't take the election, why Kerry didn't either. They're not the men for the job. Bush is. Because it's what he stands for, what ensured he got to power in the first place.

So don't disown George W, whatever you do. We have to own him because otherwise his sacrifice, along with everything else he's laying waste to, will be in vain. He's the means by which we own our shadow. We dreamed him into existence for this precise purpose. If we turn our backs on him then we, not he, will have failed the Earth.

But this isn't all. This is just part of a much bigger picture.

There's nothing really 'new' in this world. It's all down to how you join the dots and make the connections, and if you look hard enough, you'll always find someone's been there before you to light the way; wheels within wheels, spiralling on down the gyre ... Looking at energy patterns (working as a homeopath that's rather inevitable) and how they manifest, macrocosmically and microcosmically, the Bush administration's relevance to overall patterns seemed altogether rather obvious a while back and so far events are running true to form. Re-election was inevitable. Gonzales' appointment was inevitable.

People have commented that the Bush program is so extreme that it's hard to see anything positive coming from it. It is extreme, but that's an inevitable part of the sea change that's underway. (Think of the yin-yang symbol.) These guys are just, well "guys" (see below); effigies for burning. They're just the tip of the iceberg. The real menace lies in the energy pattern which they represent. This pattern manifests also in the faceless corporations whose interests are so well served by the present administration, in the rest of society which allows them to carry on doing what they do ("anything for an easy existence, just don't make me think for myself"), and in the homes, hospitals and hospices filled with those suffering from the second most common cause of death in most of Western society.

Our corporations are the tumours in the body of society. Like cancer in an individual person, they have no sense of a purposeful role in the body. All they know how to do is to grow, even if there's no sound reason for doing so. They've got to keep growing, got to keep appropriating more of the body's energy and resources. Cancer is so rife in Western society today because our collective energy is cancerous, our thinking is cancerous, and you can see reflections of the dis-ease pattern everywhere, on all levels. This is what is coming into consciousness in all kinds of ways so that our entire society can recognise it's time to dance to a different tune. And it's coming to consciousness in a manner in which we can realise how we're all implicated.

The surgeon's knife is no cure, because the fundamental dis-eased energy hasn't changed and other tumours will just pop up elsewhere (this is why changing the administration or taking out the odd Enron won't work). Radiation is no cure (and I sincerely hope that it won't get tried on a societal level over the next while) because it tends to deplete the patient to too great an extent, again without altering the fundamental energetic signature.

Cancer, at base, is about life energy which has lost its intended focus, individually and in society as a whole. The cure is for each and every one of us to step into our own lives, to think for ourselves, live for ourselves, come from our own hearts, and to express ourselves for who we truly and uniquely are. Blindly defering to the interests, opinions and agendas of others just because they seem to have some power or knowledge greater than our own is out. Abrogating responsibility to others for things that intimately affect our lives is out. Selflessly putting all our energies at the service of others without engaging it though the proper channels is out. Turning a blind eye to corporate misdemeanours while continuing to buy their products is out. You get the drift, I'm sure. (And it will take some time ... it's not like too many of us have an option to immediately stop buying gas/petrol or heating oil because the oil companies are ripping up another part of Alaska. Alternative renewable energy sources need to be installed, but they could do with a lot more support.)

Seems more than just a little strange to be touting George W Bush as the cure for cancer, but in a funny kind of way it appears to be what he's all about! On a societal level, he's one of the principal catalysts by which we're going to move out of this energy.

March 23 2005 | | | Permalink

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“ Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes. ”
Carl Gustav Jung

March 22 2005

Hall of mirrors

Someone wrote to me puzzled about yesterday's quote from Fred Alan Wolf in the movie What the #$BLEEP*! Do We Know!?, "There is no out there out there!" and asked if there's no "out there", what's really happening?

"Reality" only exists "out there" by virtue of consensus co-creation. The more you subscribe to that consensus co-creation, the more solid it appears. (Ever notice how linear time has a tendency to kick in most noticeably when we have to interact with others holding that idea of it? For more on conception of time, see the present Article of the Moment.) The waking world is no more real than the one we dream. It's just that waking mind has a lot more definite ideas about things! The Buddhists and other Eastern metaphysical perspectives have recognised this for a long time, as have the more esoteric branches of some of the Western traditions. Now physics is reaching the same conclusions.

This is how "out there" has an uncanny habit of reflecting back to us the issues we have "in here", because ultimately "out there" is just a Hall of Mirrors. This is how affirmations and visualisations can change what happens for us, though in using those techniques we're just taking our very first halting unsteady baby steps into the world of conscious creation. This is how the real masters in the Eastern traditions manage to do things like walk through solid walls. They've broken through the illusions of waking mind and can consequently relate to the material fabric of existence at a more "realistic" level.

It's difficult to grasp because waking worldy mind is so puny and limited. We exist in the delusion that waking worldly mind is what determines everything in our lives and is pretty much all there is to us, when really it's just a distraction, a small side-show to the main event. It can be a pretty noisy side-show at times though and when it starts to interfere with the main event, then the whole show can start to fall apart (= sickness and dis-ease).

March 22 2005 | | | Permalink

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The Widening Gyre from http://www.yeatsvision.com

“ Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born? ”
William Butler Yeats

March 21 2005

Gyrations

W B Yeats' poem The Second Coming (see left) has been coming up again and again (Third Coming? Fourth Coming?) in the way that raw onions have a habit of repeating on you. It started for me within the first 24 hours of this latest proving (I've no idea what the substance is yet). I mentioned it on a list I subscribe to and then started hearing from people all over the place that the poem had been coming up for them too. So obviously it's not unique to the proving energy: rather the proving energy is demonstrating its sympathetic resonance wth the energies of these times.

Some explanation is perhaps needed here. Over time, participants in homeopathic remedy provings have come to notice that concurrent events well outside the sphere of the proving frequently conform to the same themes as emerge in the detailed symptomatology. This is not to say that provings have the power to influence what happens beyond their immediate sphere, rather that the time in which they happen to externalise their energies is one in which they are in sympathetic resonance with mass consciousness.

Provings for me are always an adventure. The experience of playing host to another energy form is a bit like a voyage of discovery crossed with a detective story. I get to be Agatha Verne, or perhaps Jules (rather than Julie) Christie. Themes and images present themselves with a quiet insistence, and I'm driven to pursue them until the insistence goes away, usually at the point where I've made some connection or derived some meaning and relevance from the thread.

With The Second Coming, it was specifically the first 4 lines that kept intruding. Then I kept getting snatches of Lewis Carroll's Jabberwock ... "'Twas brillig, and the slithey toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe" ... so it then became clear that "gyre" was the word I should be focusing on. I had a reasonable sense of the word from the context and from "gyrate" but looked it up to check. A gyre is a vortex, spiral, a series of concentric circles. Most often (evidently) used in the context of ocean currents.

Then, like Yeats, "hardly are those words out when a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi troubles my sight". I see a massive vortex within the ocean of the spacetime-consciousness continuum which, at its narrow-point, connects to a mirror-image vortex so the two together appear like an hour-glass with the direction of flow passing from one to the other through the narrow-point. A sense that some kind of inter-dimensional boundary exists at the narrow-point, and that the vortex is a means of penetrating that boundary.

The vortex imagery made sense of the present energies – the sense of increased velocity and compression that many people have been experiencing. Today I discovered that Yeats himself had formulated an entire esoteric system over a period of 10 years based on material channelled by his wife George via automatic writing. It is contained in his book A Vision. Gyres feature as a fundamental structure within the system. Not only that but hour-glass double vortices as well. Sympathetic resonance in operation again!

While all this was going on, someone was posting their experiences with an energetic vortex in California. Thanks to an amusing "accidental" truncation of the subject line of the post which rendered the chapter numbering only as "chap", a conversation started up around the English word "chap". This quickly led on to the derivation of the American "guy", and its imputed origins in the English Guy Fawkes and the annual custom of burning effigies of the man in a celebration of his attempt to send the Houses of Parliament into the stratosphere on November 5 1605. I Googled [guy etymology] and in the 4th URL to come up – again purely by "chance" by virtue of the two words I'd chosen to search on – Guy Fawkes got mentioned in the same paragraph as gyre! This was not the sort of "coincidence" to ignore, especially since the "guy" thing had originated in a post about a gyre. (Has this got you spinning yet?!)

So what is the relevance of "guy" to "gyre"? A guy is an effigy, a simulacrum, a superficial representation of something which in itself is not authentic, yet serves as a guise (!) in which we recognise the idea of something. This means that the gyre, the image of the vortex (whether in macrocosm or microcosm), is the representation of what is happening in these present times, but has no authentic reality of itself.

As Fred Alan Wolf so succinctly puts it in the movie What the #$BLEEP*! Do We Know!?, "There is no out there out there!"

March 21 2005 | | | Permalink

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Makota Nakamura's Tessellating Animation

“ The dissenter is every human being at those moments of his life when he resigns momentarily from the herd and thinks for himself. ”
Archibald MacLeish

“ It is proof of a base and low mind for one to wish to think with the masses or majority, merely because the majority is the majority. Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people. ”
Giordano Bruno

March 08 2005

Disorderly conduct

Came across another article on autism (link now expired). Confirmation for the apparent significant increase in the number of cases in recent years in the United States which can't be attributed to shifting goalposts in diagnosis (which is often a large factor in changes in disease incidence statistics).

I can't help but feel we're missing something here. It has to do with our assumptions about what constitutes "healthy" and "normal" and about how apparent deviations from these states should be defined and treated. These children are described as "damaged", as having a "disorder" or "disability", yet many of them exhibit abilities far and away superior to those of "normal" individuals, and don't appear intrinsically unhealthy within themselves. Even children diagnosed with the so-called relatively "high functioning" states on the autistic spectrum, such as Asperger's Syndrome, often seem to have quite remarkable talents in certain areas. What if, in our attempts to "normalise" them into behavour that we feel more comfortable with, we are the ones who are disabling them, not their condition? Perhaps there's very good reason for their apparent inability to appreciate the social "norms" we all take for granted? Perhaps it's time those "norms" got to be seriously challenged and questioned?

When you spend time with these children, it's clear that they are open to, and taking in, far more information about their environment than so-called "normal" individuals who screen out the vast majority of sensory input. It's overwhelming: hence the lack of communication because opening up to more than they already are is too much; hence the repetitive behaviours which serve the purpose of blocking out some of that input for a while and providing something to hold onto amidst the maelstrom.

As the Article of the Moment on Daniel Tammet showed, we have an enormous amount to learn from autistic states which may well turn out to be of benefit to all of us. Isn't it time we stopped automatically labelling everything outwith the bounds of our collective comfort zones as "damaged", "disabled", "dysfunctional", "disordered", etc, and consider that we are the ones being wrong-headed about it all, not the ones we've labelled as such?

March 08 2005 | | | Permalink

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“ Reason itself is a matter of faith. It is an act of faith to assert that our thoughts have any relation to reality. ”
G K Chesterton

“ Information is not knowledge,
Knowledge is not wisdom,
Wisdom is not truth,
Truth is not beauty,
Beauty is not music.
Music is the best. ”
Frank Zappa

March 01 2005

A right goose ...

Here's a story, posted by BBC News last Tuesday, that sums up nicely what makes me so incredulous about what passes for "science" these days. Not quite nonsense perhaps. Nonscience?

Dr Sam Gosling at the University of Texas is interviewed about his psychological tests for dogs' personalities so they can be matched to owners with similar personalities. He enthused over how useful such tests could be to the likes of dog homes and presented his findings to the American Association for the Advancement of Science. I wonder are Dr Gosling and the good people at AAAS labouring under the delusion that the entire human race has only one half of a brain?

This is like using a screwdriver to hammer in a nail when you have a perfectly good hammer sitting in your tool box. It's what the right-hand sides of our brains are for. They do it effortlessly, instantaneously, and perfectly naturally, without the need for any kind of exhaustive (and exhausting) deduction or analysis. Or having to pay some "expert" to do it for you. Logic has its place, but to use it to perform functions such as pattern recognition or to model the complexities of relationship seems somewhat pointless. It can do it eventually, but only by working laboriously and sequentially through enough data – which, of course, has to be gathered in the first place – to approximate a rough degree of accuracy. And still none of that can come anywhere close to the speed, depth and precision of the faculties attributed to the right side of the human brain. It all seems a bit like trying to run a Ferrari on cartwheels. (To see just what brilliance our much-denigrated right-brain faculties are capable of, see this previous Article of the Moment from the General Essays page.)

In fact, when it comes to things like choosing a dog, we don't need to use pattern recognition, logical deduction, or even intuition. We don't need to use any conscious processes at all. We know when we like a dog – or anything/anyone else for that matter – because we're drawn to it. And if it's drawn to us, chances are it's a good match. It's called sympathetic resonance. We dance to the same tune. And opposites being but different sides of the same coin, it's also why apparent opposites attract each other too. Check out String Theory – physics is demonstrating that resonance underlies the very fabric of existence. It isn't just a good candidate for modelling quantum gravity, it provides an excellent foundation for a model describing all aspects of life experience (including homeopathy).

You dancing?

(And apologies to Dr Sam Gosling. I'm sure he's a lovely person sincere in his work. But if he will be such a goose ...)

March 01 2005 | | | Permalink

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smeddum.net – Blog: Confessions of a Serial Prover. Weblog on homeopathy, health and related subjects by homeopathic practitioner Wendy Howard